Preventing Resentment in Marriage
web: www.inspiringmarriages.net
email: inspiringmarriages@att.net
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Marriage:
- • A man and a woman
- • Physically and emotionally intimate
- • Working together in a shared life to help each other realize their visions and dreams
- • Walking with God to fulfill their callings and goals
“Jesus answered, `Have you not read this? From the time God first made people, he made them a man and a woman.” Matthew 19:4 Worldwide English (WE)
1. Marriage is exclusive between 1 male and 1 female
2. Your marriage must be free from outside influences
3. Your marriage comes first before your family or your kids
The idea that “your marriage comes first before your family or your kids” is a principal couples follow to ensure a strong and resilient marriage.
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Prioritizing the Relationship: Making your marriage a priority means investing time, energy, and affection into your relationship. This doesn’t mean neglecting other relationships, but rather ensuring that your partnership remains strong and supportive.
“For this reason, a man must leave his father and mother when he gets married and be joined to his wife. The two become one.” Ephesians 5:31 NLT
The word is prioritizing – not monopolizing.
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Role Modeling: A healthy, loving relationship between spouses sets a positive example for children and extended family. Kids benefit from seeing their parents prioritize each other and work together as a team.
“Being a role model is the most powerful form of educating” – John Wooden
Your children should see:
- Gentle non-sexual affections
- Both parents working together
- Sharing chores
- Being affectionate
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Shared Decisions: Working together on decisions and maintaining a united front can strengthen the marriage and provide stability for the entire family.
“Can two walk together, except they be agreed?” Amos 3:3
“and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.” Ephesians 5:21 NASB1995
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Quality Time: Allocating regular time for each other, even in the midst of family and parenting responsibilities, helps maintain a strong connection and prevents the relationship from becoming routine or neglected.
30 minutes of conversation every day.
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Balanced Attention: While the marriage is a priority, it’s essential to also attend to the needs of children and other family members. The goal is to find a balance where the marriage remains a central focus, but family needs are still met with love and care.
“A marriage cannot thrive on leftover attention. It has to get your best effort” – Ngina Otiende
Ecclesiastes 4:9-11 ESV
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone?
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Preventing Resentment: By maintaining a strong marital relationship, spouses are less likely to feel resentment or burnout from family responsibilities, which can contribute to a healthier family dynamic overall.
“Resentment develops when you repeatedly feel unheard, dismissed or feel that a spouse puts other interests ahead of you and the marriage.” -- Dr. Anne Brennan Malec
Isaiah 40:31 KJV
"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint"
Matthew 11:28-30 KJV
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls".
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