Hey there, lovebirds! This week, we’re diving into a biggie: God can totally restore what was lost in your marriage. So, if you’re sitting there wondering if it’s too late for you and your partner, let me tell you, it’s never too late! God is all about bringing back those lost years, restoring friendships, and rebuilding trust. We’ll chat about the little steps you can take to kickstart that restoration and remind you that no matter how far you feel you’ve drifted, God specializes in making things right again. Grab your favorite drink, snuggle up, and let’s get into it! This week, we’re diving into the juicy topic of restoration in marriage. You know, that feeling when you look at your partner and think, “Have we drifted too far?” or “Did we miss our chance to be what we once were?” Well, I’ve got some stellar news: God is the ultimate fixer-upper! He doesn’t just restore circumstances; He’s all about mending hearts, friendships, and trust. We’re tackling those pesky thoughts of doubt that creep in when things get rocky. We’ll pull from the Book of Joel, where God promises to give back what the locusts have eaten—yes, even those years that feel lost! And let’s be real, we all have those moments when life throws us curveballs and we forget to nurture our most important relationship. So join us as we explore how to reclaim what we’ve lost, one intentional step at a time. We’ll share practical tips and heartwarming insights to help you and your spouse reconnect and thrive once again. Get ready to hear some powerful truth that might make you rethink your doubts about your marriage! There’s a good chance you’ve been wondering if it’s too late for a turnaround. But we’re here to remind you: God specializes in restoration! Just like in the Book of Joel, where it’s said that God will restore the years lost to the swarming locusts, we’ll chat about how He can do the same for your relationship. We’ll also address the little things that can steal away your joy—like busyness and distractions—and how to take back your time. Share a laugh with us as we discuss the need for intentionality in relationships. Whether it’s a heartfelt conversation or just a laugh over a shared dessert, we’ll encourage you to take those baby steps back toward each other. After all, you’re not losing love; you’re just losing time. Let’s reclaim that together! We’re about to embark on a journey of rediscovery and restoration. If you’ve ever felt the weight of lost time in your marriage, you’re not alone! This week, we’ll unpack the reality that marriages often drift apart slowly. But here’s the kicker: it doesn’t have to stay that way! With God’s help, we can redeem and restore those precious years. Through engaging discussions, we’ll explore how to start rebuilding your friendship and trust, one small step at a time. Because let’s face it, you can’t just wake up one day and expect everything to be perfect; it takes a little elbow grease! So grab a cup of coffee, get comfy, and let’s dive into how you can start today. We’ll share practical tips, like spending intentional time together and asking the right questions to dig deep into each other’s hearts. Restoration starts now, and we’re here to walk with you every step of the way!
Takeaways:
- God specializes in restoration, not just of circumstances, but of hearts and relationships.
- Even if it feels like you’ve drifted too far, God can restore what seems lost.
- Restoration is about making things better than they were before, not just going back to the past.
- The first step in restoring your marriage is to focus on today, not the entire journey.
Links referenced in this episode:
Transcript
Welcome everyone to Inspiring Marriages, where Jeff and Teresa feels in.
Speaker A:Our mission is how Christian couples strengthen their friendship, grow spiritually together, and experience the marriage that God has designed.
Speaker A:Hey, Teresa.
Speaker A:This week I am so excited we get to talk about God can restore what was lost.
Speaker A:So we are looking forward to diving into this.
Speaker A:This is all Based on Joel 2.
Speaker A:25.
Speaker A:The Lord says, I will give you back what you have lost to the swarming locusts, the hopping locust, the stripping locust, and the cutting locusts.
Speaker A:So we’re going to talk about how God can restore.
Speaker A:We’re going to talk about, can God really restore the years that were lost?
Speaker A:Then we’re going to talk about the enemy wants to steal your years.
Speaker A:Don’t let him.
Speaker A:And then we’re going to talk about the first step towards restoring your marriage.
Speaker A:Let us ask you this question.
Speaker A:I know you believe that God can forgive, but do you truly believe that God can restore?
Speaker A:Many couples look at their marriage and they wonder, have we drifted too far?
Speaker A:Have we wasted too much time?
Speaker A:Have we missed our opportunity?
Speaker A:Can our relationship ever become what it once was?
Speaker B:In this video, we’re going to talk about how Scripture repeatedly reveals that God is a God who restores.
Speaker A:Let’s dive in, Teresa.
Speaker A:Let’s talk about how there are seasons in marriage.
Speaker A:We all go through different phases of marriage, from the honeymoon phase until matured Christian phase.
Speaker A:And so there’s different seasons in marriage.
Speaker A:And there can become a season where you realize we’re surviving but we’re not thriving.
Speaker A:And that’s not God’s best for us.
Speaker A:Marriages don’t fall apart overnight.
Speaker A:They drift apart slowly.
Speaker A:Months become years and years become decades.
Speaker A:But God is a restorer of of the years.
Speaker A:Point number one, lost time is real.
Speaker A:It’s not a figment of your imagination.
Speaker A:Time has passed.
Speaker A:Chronological time has passed.
Speaker A:So you’re not imagining it.
Speaker A:It really happened.
Speaker A:But God is able to redeem the time, so we’re not going to try to minimize it.
Speaker A:A lot of couples have lost friendship.
Speaker A:They’ve lost trust, they’ve lost connection.
Speaker A:They lost their spiritual intimacy.
Speaker A:They lost years to busyness.
Speaker A:So we’re not going to coat this exactly.
Speaker A:That’s not good.
Speaker A:If I were to put into a category of good or bad, I would say bad.
Speaker A:But we need to acknowledge that pain honest, honestly.
Speaker A:But we need to acknowledge the pain honestly.
Speaker A:Teresa, tell us about Psalm 90, verse 12.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:This is really beautiful concept.
Speaker B:The scripture says, teach us to number our days.
Speaker B:To me, it sounds like a prayer wanting God to help us make Us aware of how valuable each and every day is.
Speaker B:Because Jeff said, days turn into weeks and months and years where we’re not valuing the time that we have.
Speaker B:We’re not valuing the days that we have, the time that God has given us to have a blessed marriage.
Speaker B:When we value each and every day and value our marriage, we can make the most of that time.
Speaker B:Instead of time just slipping by and our marriage becoming empty or lonely or any of those things where you feel like you’ve drifted apart.
Speaker A:Like, you take an assessment of where you are and you realize what’s missing.
Speaker A:That’s right.
Speaker A:And then you realize how precious and valuable time is.
Speaker B:Yes, that’s so true.
Speaker B:Because time, once time has passed, it’s passed.
Speaker B:You can’t change what’s already happened in the past.
Speaker B:But we have to, like Jeff said, look at what’s missing and what we would like to see happening in our marriages and make the most from the present now all the way through the future.
Speaker B:Make the most of the time that we have together.
Speaker A:Point number two.
Speaker A:God is a restorer.
Speaker A:Joel 2.
Speaker A:25.
Speaker A:That new living translation tells us, the Lord says, I will give you back what you lost to the swarming locusts, the hopping locust, to the stripping locusts, and the cutting locusts.
Speaker A:So we can see, this area was so devastated.
Speaker A:You ever seen a picture where locusts have come in, and this describes four different kind of locusts that came and destroyed their crop?
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And you’ve seen the devastation.
Speaker A:You’ve seen the famine that can come to whole areas of Africa where people just.
Speaker A:They just suffer for famine for years and years.
Speaker A:Years.
Speaker A:It takes a long time to recover from a locust infestation.
Speaker A:But God says, I will restore.
Speaker A:No, God said, I will give you back what you lost.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:So he’s not promising to rewind the clock.
Speaker A:You’re not going to wake up tomorrow morning and you’re both newlyweds again.
Speaker A:You’re 20 years old.
Speaker A:No, that’s not what God promised us.
Speaker A:He promised restoration.
Speaker A:And when God restores something, he makes it better than what it was before.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:You think you’ve lost connection.
Speaker B:You might have lost emotional intimacy.
Speaker B:You might have lost making memories together, might have lost spiritual connection.
Speaker B:But God says, I can restore every one of those things, every single area that you felt like devastation has come or time has passed without connecting, without being close.
Speaker B:I can restore that.
Speaker B:And he knows just how to do that.
Speaker A:It means healing, bringing healing to your marriage.
Speaker A:It means rebuilding your marriage, rebuilding that friendship in your marriage Rebuilding that connection.
Speaker A:It means renewing your love, your love for him and your love for each other.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:And it just makes your marriage feel like it’s new again.
Speaker B:It does.
Speaker A:It means redeeming, which means to make the most of every opportunity.
Speaker A:That’s what that means, that God will help us do all those things.
Speaker A:Romans 8:28 tells us, and we know that, that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose for them.
Speaker A:God didn’t cause drift in your marriage.
Speaker A:God didn’t cause hurt in your marriage.
Speaker A:God didn’t cause all those things in your marriage.
Speaker A:But he will restore those years.
Speaker A:He’ll bring healing.
Speaker A:He will rebuild, help you rebuild your marriage.
Speaker A:Because he does that for those who love him, who are called according to his purpose.
Speaker B:So I know that we have learned that God can even use painful seasons where you, like Jeff said, you were drifting apart.
Speaker B:You were sensing hurt and having things that were going unforgiven and just lack of communication, lack of connection.
Speaker B:But God can use that painful season.
Speaker B:He didn’t cause.
Speaker B:It was.
Speaker B:We made choices that weren’t the best for our marriage.
Speaker B:But he can take that painful season and turn it into lessons learned.
Speaker B:You could say, and say, now we’re going to start afresh.
Speaker B:We’re going to do things differently because God is showing us a new way to treat one another, a new way to regard our marriage as precious and each other as precious.
Speaker B:So the painful seasons, something that now you can say share to other people.
Speaker B:We learn from this not because God caused it, but because he brought us through and he brought us out.
Speaker A:This is one of the reasons we wrote our new book.
Speaker A:You’re not losing love, you’re losing time.
Speaker A:Because we discover that many marriage problems are not caused by a lack of love.
Speaker A:More often, more often, couples are losing time that they could be using to build friendship.
Speaker A:They stop talking, they stop connecting, they stop investing.
Speaker A:Time passes.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:Then they wonder where the closeness went.
Speaker A:The encouraging news is that God can redeem what has been neglected when we begin to intentionally invest again.
Speaker A:Point number three, restoration starts today.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:The enemy wants so many couples to focus on the past and focus on regret.
Speaker B:He can have you just wallowing in self pity and regret and sadness and sorrow and loss.
Speaker B:But there’s no life there.
Speaker B:There’s no restoration there.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:So God wants us to focus on redemption.
Speaker B:He can redeem the time.
Speaker B:He can redeem what your broken hearts and make them whole again.
Speaker B:He can redeem your entire marriage.
Speaker B:It’s just so beautiful.
Speaker B:He didn’t invest in your marriage and bring you together for you to lose.
Speaker B:What occurred to me the other day when Jeff and I were talking on a little Friday night date, that a lot of times we’ll tend to look back and say, I shouldn’t have made this decision or because I made that decision now.
Speaker B:Am I in the right place with God?
Speaker B:Am I on the right path?
Speaker B:Am I where I’m supposed to be?
Speaker B:At the right place, the right time?
Speaker B:But looking back never helps you move forward.
Speaker B:It will not help you move forward.
Speaker B:And that’s what we’re talking about as a couple.
Speaker B:We can’t look back and just say, oh, we regret doing this.
Speaker B:We were so sad about that.
Speaker B:No, because it’s in the past.
Speaker B:And God wants us looking forward and taking steps to move forward now and see him restore everything step by step as we’re following Him.
Speaker A:That’s so good.
Speaker A:God calls couples towards redemption.
Speaker A:Ephesians, chapter 5, verse 15 to 17 in the New King James Version says, see then that you walk circumspectly or carefully, not as fools, but as wise.
Speaker A:Redeemed the time because the days are evil.
Speaker A:Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of God is.
Speaker A:The will of God is for redemption cannot reclaim yesterday, but you can redeem today.
Speaker A:We have a challenge for you today.
Speaker A:Ask each other this question.
Speaker A:What is the one area in our marriage where we need God’s restoration?
Speaker A:Ask a question, be honest, don’t become defensive.
Speaker A:Listen and then ask God for help.
Speaker A:If today’s video helped you, you’ll find these ideas explored even in greater detail in our new book, you’re not losing love, you’re losing time, which should be out hopefully soon.
Speaker A:It’s with the publishers final revisions and if you would like our free resource, head on over to the inspiringmarriages.net and under the resource tab you’ll find all the free resources that we have available.
Speaker A:You can sign up for one or all of the resources.
Speaker A:Just pick the resource that you want.
Speaker A:You have to enter your email because we have to have permission to send it to you and we will send you a link to that free resource for the resource for this podcast.
Speaker A:It’s from Lonely the Best Friends Again.
Speaker A:It’s a seven day journey using practical tips and scripture where you’ll go from where you are today to best friends with your spouse.
Speaker A:You’re not losing love, you’re losing time.
Speaker A:And when you begin redeeming your time, God can begin restoring what was lost.
Speaker A:The Enemy wants to steal your years.
Speaker A:Don’t let them.
Speaker A:Let me ask you this question.
Speaker A:Do you look in your marriage and say, it’s too late, things have gone too far, We’ve wasted too much time.
Speaker A:If you have, we have good news for you.
Speaker A:God is a restorer of time.
Speaker A:Most couples don’t intentionally neglect their marriage.
Speaker A:Life simply becomes too crowded.
Speaker A:The enemy loves distraction because distraction often produces distance.
Speaker B:In this video, we’re going to talk about how the enemy brings distraction, but also how you can protect what matters most.
Speaker A:Let’s dive in.
Speaker A:John:Speaker A:God has come so we may have life and life more abundantly.
Speaker A:So the enemy rarely starts with a big catastrophe.
Speaker A:It’s usually not a big attack.
Speaker A:It’s usually distraction.
Speaker B:That’s right.
Speaker B:He’ll use little things to distract you from having quality time with each other.
Speaker A:That’s right.
Speaker A:Number one.
Speaker A:Small drifts become big distances.
Speaker A:So there’s little small things.
Speaker A:Song of Solomon talked about is the little foxes destroyed the whole vineyard things.
Speaker A:It’s those phones, right?
Speaker A:It’s that distraction on the phones.
Speaker A:And even before that, television has been a distraction for decades.
Speaker A:It can be your work can be a distraction.
Speaker A:It can be your schedules are distraction.
Speaker A:Maybe you got two much going on to simplify your life.
Speaker B:Yes, yes.
Speaker A:You can even have ministry overload, where you’re trying to do everything, but you can’t do everything.
Speaker B:That’s right.
Speaker A:You have to be led with the Lord.
Speaker A:You have to do what he tells you to do.
Speaker A:You can’t just overextend yourself.
Speaker A:The need is so great.
Speaker A:You’re not called to the need.
Speaker A:You’re called to.
Speaker A:To the call.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker B:You’re called to usually one major thing and not 10 things, right?
Speaker B:That’s so important.
Speaker A:None of these are evil by themselves, but together they slowly replace connection.
Speaker A:Point number two.
Speaker A:Busyness is one of the biggest threats.
Speaker A:Ephesians, chapter five, 15, 17.
Speaker A:Paul told us to make redeemed a time.
Speaker A:See that you walk circumspectly, carefully, not as fools, but as wise.
Speaker A:Redeeming the time because the days are evil.
Speaker A:Therefore, do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is.
Speaker A:Redeem the time.
Speaker A:You also say, make the most of every opportunity.
Speaker B:This scripture has ministered to me for years.
Speaker B:And understanding what the will of the Lord is.
Speaker B:Okay, Lord, what do you want me to do today?
Speaker B:How do you want me to use my time?
Speaker B:How do you want me to spend time with my family?
Speaker B:How do you want us to spend time together for our marriage.
Speaker B:Find out what the will of the Lord is for each and every day.
Speaker B:And that’s going to take some being intentional, being purposeful.
Speaker B:But this will save you a lot of lost time, save you a lot of things crowding out what’s really important in your life.
Speaker A:The greatest dangers aren’t always the bad priorities.
Speaker A:Sometimes it’s good things that’s pushing out great things.
Speaker A:When Jesus says the thief comes to steal, kill and destroy, many couples think about major crisis.
Speaker A:But sometimes what gets stolen is very subtle.
Speaker A:It’s conversation, it’s connection, it’s shared experiences, it’s friendship.
Speaker A:And one of the reasons we wrote our new book, you’re not losing love, you’re losing time, because we wanted couples to recognize these small losses before they become major distances.
Speaker B:That’s right.
Speaker A:So we’ve been married for 34, almost 35 years now.
Speaker A:And we gone through different seasons and sometimes our lives were very busy, especially when the children were younger, very busy and a lot of stuff going on.
Speaker A:And it’s so easy to just become schedule minded.
Speaker A:We’re just trying to manage your life.
Speaker B:Yeah, manage your life.
Speaker A:You’re trying to get through your week.
Speaker A:And it’s been so easy to keep our conversation to how are the children?
Speaker A:How was church?
Speaker A:How was work?
Speaker A:But what really needs to be happening is for me to ask Teresa, what’s going on in your heart?
Speaker A:What has God been showing you?
Speaker A:So those are the deep connections that every marriage needs.
Speaker A:You need to dig down and get beyond schedules.
Speaker A:I need to take this person here, that person there.
Speaker A:I need to do this, I need to do that.
Speaker A:We’re ministering here, we’re ministering there.
Speaker A:No, you got to get down and find out and have that deep conversation with what is going on in that heart.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:It really reminds me when we forget to have special time with God every day.
Speaker B:There was a song that came out years ago, I miss my time with you.
Speaker B:And the Lord was.
Speaker B:The song was saying, the Lord is saying, I miss having one on one time with you.
Speaker B:And we don’t want to experience that in our marriage where there’s never really one on one time, where we find out what’s going on in each other’s hearts.
Speaker B:What are you dealing with?
Speaker B:What are you happy about?
Speaker B:What are you struggling with?
Speaker B:Is there something we can pray about together and really find out what’s going on with each other?
Speaker B:We, we have to have that in our marriage.
Speaker A:Point number three, start protecting what matters most.
Speaker A:So this week, start protecting your Marriage.
Speaker A:Marriage requires intentional investment.
Speaker A:No, marriage drifts towards intimacy.
Speaker A:We learned in science that even nature drifts towards anarchy, doesn’t drift towards order, towards disorder.
Speaker A:Marriage doesn’t just drift into intimacy, but it does drift into distance.
Speaker A:Start protecting this week.
Speaker A:What matters most.
Speaker A:Protect your time.
Speaker A:Protect your connection.
Speaker A:Make that effort.
Speaker A:So we have a challenge for you this week.
Speaker A:Spend 30 minutes of uninterrupted time with your spouse.
Speaker A:No phones, no television, just talking.
Speaker A:30 Minutes.
Speaker A:You can do it.
Speaker A:I know you can.
Speaker A:We have confidence in you.
Speaker A:30 Minutes with your spouse.
Speaker A:You don’t talk about the kids.
Speaker A:Don’t talk about church.
Speaker A:You don’t talk about jobs.
Speaker A:You talk about each other.
Speaker A:Find out what’s going on.
Speaker A:Going on.
Speaker A:Find out what husbands.
Speaker A:Find out what God has shown your wife.
Speaker A:Wise.
Speaker A:Find out what God has shown your husband and just have 30 minutes uninterrupted conversation.
Speaker A:I really look forward to that this week.
Speaker B:Yes, yes.
Speaker A:Have 30 minutes uninterrupted conversation.
Speaker A:Remember, you’re not losing love, you’re losing time.
Speaker A:And we begin to redeem your time.
Speaker A:God can begin restoring what was lost.
Speaker A:And if you would like our free resource, head on over to the inspiring marriages.net and under the resource tab you’ll find all the free resources that we have available.
Speaker A:You can sign up for one or all of the resources.
Speaker A:Just pick the resource that you want.
Speaker A:You have to enter your email because we have to have permission to send it to you.
Speaker A:And we will send you a link to that free resource for for the resource for this podcast.
Speaker A:It’s from Lonely the Best Friends.
Speaker A:Again.
Speaker A:It’s a seven day journey using practical tips and scripture where you’ll go from you are today to best friends with your spouse.
Speaker A:Let me ask you this question.
Speaker A:Do you sometimes feel overwhelmed in your marriage?
Speaker A:A lot of couples feel like their restoration requires a massive change in your life and a massive, massive life makeover.
Speaker A:But it doesn’t.
Speaker A:It usually begins with one intentional step.
Speaker B:This video.
Speaker B:We’re going to talk about the steps for restoring your marriage.
Speaker A:Let’s dive in.
Speaker A:So many couples have a question.
Speaker A:Where do we begin?
Speaker A:We’ve lost our friendship.
Speaker A:We lost our trust.
Speaker A:We lost our connection.
Speaker A:We lost our spiritual intimacy.
Speaker A:We have lost years to busyness.
Speaker A:Where do we begin?
Speaker A:We’re going to tell you.
Speaker B:That’s a really good question that most people have.
Speaker B:God has answers for us.
Speaker A:Point number one, stop looking at the entire journey.
Speaker A:Focus on today.
Speaker A:Lamentations, chapter 3, verse 22 and 23 tells us the steadfast love of the Lord never ceases his mercies never come to an end, are new every morning.
Speaker A:Wow, Great is your faithfulness.
Speaker A:God gives us grace for today’s obedience.
Speaker A:Like the old saying, I’m not trying to be too flippant.
Speaker A:How do you eat an elephant?
Speaker A:The answer is one.
Speaker A:So how do you, how do you begin this journey?
Speaker A:You just can’t go look and say, okay, I see where we are today and I see where we want to be.
Speaker A:I don’t see how we can possibly get there.
Speaker A:You can’t look at the entire journey.
Speaker A:You have to look at today.
Speaker A:We have.
Speaker A:God gives us grace for today’s obedience.
Speaker B:He always leads us in steps.
Speaker B:That has helped me so much, helped me not to become overwhelmed when I see where I want to get to in something, but I know I’m not even close to being there.
Speaker B:He’s going to take me a step at a time towards that end goal or toward that desired result.
Speaker B:And that’s what he does in our marriages.
Speaker B:He’s going to lead you a day at a time.
Speaker B:One step at a time.
Speaker A:Point number two, rebuild your friendship.
Speaker A:First, you talked a lot and you did fun things together.
Speaker A:Remember?
Speaker A:Think back.
Speaker A:You talked a lot and you did fun things together.
Speaker A:Guys, you remember how you are looking forward to that Friday night date and you were just excited about spending time with your sweetie and you look forward to it and you planned it.
Speaker A:Ladies, you remember how you picked out your outfit and you fixed your hair a certain way and you picked out your perfume.
Speaker A:You knew what necklaces you’re going to wear and you had everything.
Speaker A:Your shoes.
Speaker A:You knew what shoes you’re going to wear.
Speaker A:It was important to you because you planned it and you were intentional and you have to rebuild that friendship.
Speaker A:You can do it in conversations.
Speaker A:Remember how much you talked on the phone.
Speaker A:Remember when the phone’s on the wall and you had to talk?
Speaker B:Long talks.
Speaker A:You had long talks.
Speaker A:You had the long cord where you could lay down the floor or you could sit in the chair.
Speaker A:It was a big, long cord.
Speaker A:So remember the conversation, how much they matter then.
Speaker A:They matter just as much today as they did then.
Speaker A:Conversations matter.
Speaker A:They really do go on walks together.
Speaker A:It doesn’t cost anything to go on a walk.
Speaker B:No.
Speaker A:If you don’t have a park nearby, you can drive someplace that has a park and do some walking together.
Speaker A:Walk and talk as you get some good exercise and you’re really building that emotional connection.
Speaker A:You really are.
Speaker B:That’s good.
Speaker A:Have a coffee together.
Speaker A:Coffee, tea, dessert, something.
Speaker A:Do something together.
Speaker A:Where you are doesn’t Take a lot of effort.
Speaker A:Go get a milkshake together and share a banana split.
Speaker A:Do something.
Speaker A:I know our nutritionists are yelling at me right now, but do something together that doesn’t take a lot of effort, but it’s very enjoyable.
Speaker B:That’s right.
Speaker A:Laugh together.
Speaker A:Watch a movie that you enjoy, that you laugh, or a TV show that you love and talk about it and laugh together with it.
Speaker A:Share some laughter.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:Play a silly game or play with your kids, or if you’re older, little older, like we are, play with your grandkids.
Speaker B:Do things that are so fun and especially, like Jess said, get you outdoors.
Speaker B:That’s always great.
Speaker B:Just places where you can laugh together, enjoy something together.
Speaker B:Play putt putt golf.
Speaker B:Something that doesn’t take a lot of mental thinking, but you can enjoy conversation and fun together.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Talk about your shared experiences.
Speaker A:Hey, remember we went to this place or we did this.
Speaker B:Oh, yes.
Speaker A:Remember when the kids did this and they played little league or dance or whatever it was.
Speaker A:Talk about your shared experiences.
Speaker A:Remember we went to saw this minister at a certain conference.
Speaker A:Talk about your shared experiences and talk about your life together.
Speaker A:Bring those things back up.
Speaker A:Stir those things back up.
Speaker A:Just rebuild that friendship.
Speaker B:That’s right.
Speaker A:God designed husband and wife to be friends for life.
Speaker B:That’s right.
Speaker A:He didn’t design you to drift apart.
Speaker A:That is not God’s part of God’s design.
Speaker A:It really isn’t.
Speaker A:And our new book, you’re not losing love, you’re losing time.
Speaker A:We discuss the truth that transformed our own perspective.
Speaker A:Marriages are not rebuilt through one gigantic moment.
Speaker A:They’re rebuilt through thousands and thousands of small moments.
Speaker A:It’s one conversation, it’s one prayer.
Speaker A:It’s one walk.
Speaker A:It’s one intentional evening together.
Speaker A:That’s how restoration usually happens.
Speaker B:That’s right.
Speaker B:That has to become your new normal.
Speaker B:To be intentional, to.
Speaker B:To have conversation, to be intentional, to pray together.
Speaker B:To be intentional about sharing spiritual things together and sharing fun together.
Speaker B:That just.
Speaker B:It needs to be your new normal.
Speaker B:Instead of allowing everything else to crowd that out of your life and out of your marriage.
Speaker B:It makes an enormous difference.
Speaker A:Point number three.
Speaker A:Consistency beats intensity.
Speaker A:It’s the small daily investments.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:It’s not the occasional grand gestures.
Speaker A:Ten minutes a day, sit down with each other, no interruptions.
Speaker A:Talk about each other, check in with each other, pray together.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:You have daily check ins.
Speaker A:You kiss each other.
Speaker A:You hug each other goodbye, you kiss each other hello, greet each other.
Speaker A:When one of you comes home, you greet each other.
Speaker A:And you just take the time to be Nice to each other.
Speaker A:And just those small moments, Theresa.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:Those are huge investments in your marriage.
Speaker B:And you learn to raise your level of expecting that this is how it should be.
Speaker B:Instead of just settling for.
Speaker B:We just pass each other when one comes home or both of you come home from work, or we get busy with dinner and the kids and don’t take time to talk or connect in the evening.
Speaker B:And then it’s like day.
Speaker B:Another day starts and the same things happen all over again.
Speaker B:Don’t want that to be your normal anymore.
Speaker B:When you recognize this.
Speaker B:Just little things.
Speaker B:Every moment that you have makes a world of difference and it will transform.
Speaker A:Your marriage and even connecting physically.
Speaker A:One minute hug.
Speaker A:Have you done last time you did a one minute hug where you just hug.
Speaker B:It seems like a long time when you first start doing that, but it just ministers so much to you inside.
Speaker B:It really does.
Speaker A:22Nd kiss.
Speaker A:Pecs are good, but 22nd kiss, that’s a long time if you haven’t done it in a while.
Speaker A:It just really does something to your relationship when you, when you have physical contact.
Speaker B:That’s right.
Speaker A:During the day.
Speaker A:It really does.
Speaker A:Point number four.
Speaker A:You have to trust God with the process.
Speaker A:Psalms 125, verse 5 and 6 tells us, those who plant in tears will harvest with shouts of joy.
Speaker A:They weep as they go to plant their seed, but they sing as they return with the harvest.
Speaker A:Restoration often happens gradually.
Speaker A:You may seem like you’re, oh, I’m so.
Speaker A:And I’m giving.
Speaker A:I’m doing all I can.
Speaker A:We’re doing what we can.
Speaker A:We’re trying.
Speaker A:The Bible says God is not mocked as a man soweth he shall also reap.
Speaker A:People use that in a negative way, but I’m telling you, we use that in a positive way.
Speaker B:That’s right.
Speaker A:So good things.
Speaker B:So good things.
Speaker A:Intentions.
Speaker A:When you sow time, you sow kindness.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:So thoughtfulness.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:Those small gestures.
Speaker A:And you sow those into your marriage.
Speaker A:You’re going to reap with joy.
Speaker A:And Psalm tells us with shouts of joy.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:Singing when you return with the harvest.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:That’s so beautiful.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:You’re just going to have such sweetness.
Speaker B:Return to your relationship.
Speaker B:It’s just, oh, we can’t wait to spend time together.
Speaker B:We just love being together.
Speaker B:That’s going to be part of the harvest.
Speaker B:I’m sure that you’re going to find so many other ways that you’re going to be seeing a lot of reaping coming from every little thing that you sow into each other and into your marriage.
Speaker A:We have a challenge for you this week.
Speaker A:What’s the one intentional step that you can take today?
Speaker B:Good.
Speaker A:So God restores the years by helping us redeem today’s opportunities.
Speaker A:Remember, you’re not losing love.
Speaker A:You’re losing time.
Speaker A:And you begin to redeem the time.
Speaker A:God can begin restoring what was lost.
Speaker B:God designed husband and wife to be friends for life.
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