4 Fun Ways to Boost Your Christian Marriage
Looking to spice up your Christian marriage? We’ve got four super easy ways to improve your connection that you’ll want to hear! First up, we dive into the importance of having fun together—because let’s face it, who doesn’t love a good laugh with their favorite person? Then, we get real about the power of daily prayer—seriously, it’s like the glue that holds everything together. We'll also chat about the magic of making eye contact when you talk, because trust me, it’s a game changer. So, grab that snack, settle in, and let’s get ready to boost that marriage of yours! Ready to level up your marriage? Jeff and Teresa are back with some super chill and totally practical tips on how to make your Christian marriage even better. First up, they dive into the importance of having fun together. Seriously, when was the last time you and your partner did something just for kicks? Life can be a total grind with work, kids, and all those church commitments, but don't forget that friendship is the bedrock of a happy marriage. They share ideas for date nights and fun activities that keep the connection alive—like revisiting those old family videos that make you both laugh. And hey, they even have a PDF with 20 fun date ideas linked in the description. Score! Next, they talk about the power of prayer. Yup, that’s right—spending just a few moments in prayer together can glue your relationship tighter than ever. Jeff drops some mind-blowing stats about couples who pray together not ending up in divorce. Seriously, it’s like miracle glue for your marriage. They emphasize keeping it simple; even a quick prayer before bed can change everything. You don't need a fancy ritual—just a little time for gratitude and connection can do wonders. And let’s not forget about the importance of eye contact! Jeff and Teresa stress how vital it is to genuinely connect when communicating. It’s all about making your partner feel seen and heard, especially in a world full of distractions. So, pull those eyes away from the screens and really engage with each other. They even introduce their bonus tip—the 5-Minute Eye Connection Challenge—because who wouldn’t want to increase that emotional intimacy in just five minutes? It’s golden advice wrapped in a cozy package, perfect for any busy couple looking to rekindle that spark!
Takeaways:
- Having fun together is a crucial part of building a strong marriage, so don't forget to laugh!
- Daily prayer not only strengthens your relationship but also connects you spiritually as a couple.
- Making eye contact during conversations shows you value each other and deepens emotional intimacy.
- Protect those precious five minutes before bed to connect and reinforce your bond daily.
Links referenced in this episode:
Transcript
Welcome to Inspiring Marriages, the faith based podcast where we help Christian couples build stronger friendships, deeper intimacy and lasting connection through biblical principles.
Speaker B:We're Jeff and Teresa Fields and we've been married for 34 years.
Speaker B:And let's be honest, strong Christian marriages just doesn't happen.
Speaker B:They're built intentionally, prayerfully and consistently.
Speaker A:Today's episode is entitled four easy ways to improve your Christian marriage.
Speaker A:If you're a mature married Christian who wants to grow closer spiritually and emotionally, this conversation is for you, Teresa.
Speaker B:Today we just want to talk about some four fun ways to draw closer in our marriage to improve our marriage.
Speaker B:And number one, this is something we've been harping on and teaching about for this is our third year.
Speaker B:Have fun together.
Speaker B:When you build your friendship, you build your marriage.
Speaker A:That is so true.
Speaker A:Many Christian couples focus on responsibilities like church, work, ministry, family.
Speaker A:But forget that friendship is the foundation of a strong marriage.
Speaker B:And we certainly know about that, don't we?
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker B:We're going to put a link in the description today.
Speaker B:The podcast description Description for a PDF on how to have fun.
Speaker B:20 fun data ideas so you can have fun because you need to be connected in, in every way.
Speaker B:So there's four main areas of intimacy, of course.
Speaker B:There's the spiritual intimacy, there's emotional intimacy, there's intellectual intimacy and there's physical intimacy.
Speaker B:So you want to do activities that draw you together and in all areas.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker A:That's so good.
Speaker B:And like you said, it's just so easy just to get focused on life and focus on responsibilities, especially if there's children involved and, or you're serving at church.
Speaker B:It's just, it is so easy to come preoccupied, you know, even with ministry, preoccupied with ministry that you neglect focus in on the main thing that matters is which is your relationship.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:Ecclesiastes 9.
Speaker B:9 says enjoy life with the wife whom you love.
Speaker B:So joy isn't optional.
Speaker B:Also biblical, right?
Speaker A:That's so good.
Speaker A:And if there's not joy, then something's not right.
Speaker B:Something.
Speaker A:So of course it's not hard to do.
Speaker A:You can schedule to have a regular date night.
Speaker A:You can take walks together, do things that make you laugh.
Speaker A:It's so fun to just laugh together at a fun movie or a silly song or something your kids did when they were little and you talk about it and go over it or watch really old family videos.
Speaker A:It's just a great way to stay encouraged together.
Speaker A:And fun together builds emotional intimacy and it restores connection in your Christian marriage.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Just, just try Stuff.
Speaker B:Whether it's putting a puzzle together or just having a no device night where you don't have any devices on or you're binging your favorite movie or TV series, or you just, you know, going on a picnic together, just get some ice cream or just something fun.
Speaker B:Just take time to.
Speaker B:To keep that friendship alive and keep that friendship growing.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker B:Because we.
Speaker B:We know, we.
Speaker B:We teach that friendship fuels the romance.
Speaker B:And the problem is, Teresa, that if.
Speaker B:When couples stop having fun together and, you know, there's.
Speaker B:There's so focus on their responsibilities and just.
Speaker B:It's just the stress of just getting to the next month, just the bills, the responsibilities, that couples just stop having fun.
Speaker B:And when.
Speaker B:When that happens, it's so easy just to drift into roommate mode.
Speaker A:Mm.
Speaker A:Mm.
Speaker A:So we're gonna start the next.
Speaker B:Anything else to say?
Speaker A:No, I didn't have anything.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker A:Did you want me to add anything?
Speaker B:I'm always gonna have stuff.
Speaker B:This is just guidelines.
Speaker B:It's not a script.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:Okay.
Speaker B:It's only like five minutes.
Speaker B:We're only five minutes into this.
Speaker A:Oh, okay.
Speaker B:All right.
Speaker B:You do number two.
Speaker A:So I.
Speaker A:Do I need to say number two?
Speaker B:Yeah, yeah, number two.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Number two is to pray every day.
Speaker A:This is super important.
Speaker A:Of course.
Speaker A:This is in the realm of spiritual intimacy.
Speaker A:So pray together every day.
Speaker A:That's.
Speaker A:That's so vital because, you know, you're connected to God individually, but when you get connected to God together in your marriage, it's very powerful.
Speaker B:Everyone has seen the divorce rates across the United States and how alarming it is, but there is a stat that's incredible.
Speaker B: : Speaker A:It's.
Speaker B:It is like so insignificant.
Speaker B:It doesn't exist.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:So because prayer is to glue, it's the glue of a Christian marriage.
Speaker B:Genesis chapter 2 says, for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be and cleave shall glue shall adhere to.
Speaker B:To his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
Speaker B:So it's that glue that prayer is, is really an essential part of that glue that keeps a Christian together.
Speaker B:And when couples pray together, so not only are they growing close to each other when they pray for each other, but they're inviting God into their communication, into their conflict resolution, and you're inviting God into your decision making.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker A:That's so good.
Speaker A:So you might think it.
Speaker A:It's going to take a long time just to have some prayer together, but really, it can just take five minutes.
Speaker A:You could start there and just.
Speaker A:You don't have to have a long prayer list.
Speaker A:Just bring one thing that you want to pray about or pray over a scripture that you think is helpful for your marriage.
Speaker A:Um, it's great to focus on your marriage first and not focus on problems.
Speaker A:You know, it's easy to come and bring problems to the Lord, but then you might get up from prayer and, you know, still be worried.
Speaker A:But bring your marriage before the Lord and just thank God.
Speaker A:Thank God for each other.
Speaker A:Thank God for his presence in your home and your marriage, and you can pray for over your children.
Speaker A:You know, if you take the positive approach that God is in this and God is working and God is helping us.
Speaker A:Instead of thinking on the problems and coming to God, you know, with a problem mentality, it's.
Speaker A:It's so much better outcome for your marriage.
Speaker A:You know, you're.
Speaker A:You're going to get up feeling like, yeah, we have assurance now because we focus on God and his ability and what he's doing in our lives.
Speaker A:Instead of focusing on needs and problems.
Speaker A:It's.
Speaker A:It's okay to bring your needs to him.
Speaker A:But, you know, start off your prayer with thank, being thankful and recognizing that God is doing things in your life and your marriage.
Speaker B:Of course, we know in Matthew, chapter 18, verse 20, Jesus said, where two or three are gathered in my name, I am with them.
Speaker B:So daily prayer strengthens spiritual intimacy and it protects our marriage from division number three.
Speaker B:Make eye contact when you speak.
Speaker A:So good.
Speaker A:It's surprising, but eye contact is really powerful.
Speaker A:We see it all the time in public now.
Speaker A:There are couples walking together or sitting down to get dinner together, or they may be in church together or whatever they're doing out in public.
Speaker A:And they don't seem to really be looking at each other or talking to each other.
Speaker A:It's kind of like, you know, saying things, but they're not really connecting.
Speaker A:But eye contact really just removes the walls and the barriers, doesn't it?
Speaker A:It's so, so valuable to look into each other's eyes when you're talking to each other, right?
Speaker B:Have you ever been talking to someone and.
Speaker B:And they won't look up from their, their phone?
Speaker B:Huh.
Speaker B:Huh?
Speaker B:Or they're, they're looking at a piece of paper or writing on a piece of paper, and you're, you know, trying to talk to them.
Speaker B:They won't give you even the courtesy of looking at you.
Speaker B:Well, that's how it is.
Speaker B:If you're, if you're sitting on the couch and You're.
Speaker B:And you're scrolling through your reels or you're looking at something while your spouse is trying to talk to you?
Speaker B:That's.
Speaker B:That's the same thing, right?
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Eye contact builds emotional safety.
Speaker B:It.
Speaker B:You're really.
Speaker B:When you make eye contact with your spouse, you're saying to them, you matter.
Speaker A:Mm.
Speaker A:That is so true.
Speaker A:I mean, you can tell that the person is giving you their attention too, and that's so important.
Speaker A:Like you said, instead of just looking so distracted when you're.
Speaker A:You're trying to talk to your spouse, then you see you have their attention.
Speaker A:They're looking at you, they're listening.
Speaker A:So it's.
Speaker A:It's wonderful.
Speaker A:Just kind of slow everything down.
Speaker A:Have you ever seen a movie where it looks like the two people are in the scene in their normal speed and the whole scene around them slows down, like in slow motion?
Speaker A:And that's.
Speaker A:It's.
Speaker A:It's great that they can depict that in a movie, but really with eye contact, it really does just get rid of the distractions, slows things down, and then you can have better communication.
Speaker A:It's so amazing.
Speaker A:You can hear each other so much better when you're looking at each other and you get the intent of what each other is saying.
Speaker A:I really like that.
Speaker A:You know, you're not going to misunderstand each other as much.
Speaker A:You'll hear the intention and the tone of voice and the way their eyes are looking at you.
Speaker A:The.
Speaker B:That just.
Speaker A:It makes all the difference.
Speaker A:You know, Jeff's eyes, it just can melt me sometimes because I see all the love in his eyes, and it really blesses me.
Speaker A:So it's like you could say anything, and I'll be happy if you're correcting me.
Speaker A:It's like, okay.
Speaker A:Because, you know, the eyes should really tell us what is the heart behind what they're saying.
Speaker B:And even Proverbs 4.
Speaker B:25 tells us, Let your eyes look straight ahead.
Speaker B:So focus.
Speaker B:What you focus is focus on.
Speaker B:It really matters.
Speaker B:It's what you're.
Speaker B:You're giving priority to.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker B:So when couples stop and look at each other when they're talking, they really see each other and the connection deepens, doesn't it?
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:That's so good.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:I love that.
Speaker A:And when you're looking at your spouse, you are focusing on them instead of letting the distractions pull you away.
Speaker A:And they feel it.
Speaker A:You know, you feel like, okay, I'm important.
Speaker A:You know, I mean something to my spouse.
Speaker A:And we kind of know that.
Speaker A:But to to keep.
Speaker A:What's the word?
Speaker A:Reinforcing.
Speaker A:So we know that.
Speaker A:But to keep reinforcing it on a daily basis is.
Speaker A:Is so powerful.
Speaker A:It just like you said, it keeps that connection going.
Speaker A:It builds your marriage, it builds your friendship.
Speaker B:Hey, head on over to the Inspiring Marriages website, inspiringmarriages.net and there you can see all of our previous episodes as well as their show notes.
Speaker B:And you can sign up for the keep in touch section.
Speaker B:And you can receive all of our free PDFs for free.
Speaker A:There's some really good ones.
Speaker B:Now, Teresa, we have a bonus tip.
Speaker B:So tip number one was to have fun together.
Speaker B:Don't stop having fun when you went on dates, when you met each other, you did fun things together.
Speaker B:Don't stop doing those things.
Speaker B:Number two, pray together every day.
Speaker B:You cannot overemphasize the importance.
Speaker B:You cannot exaggerate the importance of praying together as a couple.
Speaker B:And number three was to make eye contact when you speak.
Speaker B:Now, Teresa, what's our bonus tip of the day?
Speaker A:Yes, we've got a really good bonus tip.
Speaker A:Here is.
Speaker A:What part should I say?
Speaker A:Here's the bonus tip that transformed our marriage.
Speaker A:Or just.
Speaker B:You don't have to say.
Speaker A:You want me to say that.
Speaker B:You don't have to say that part.
Speaker A:Do you want me to say that?
Speaker B:Just talk about it.
Speaker A:Oh, just talk about it.
Speaker A:Is it the five minutes earlier?
Speaker B:Just.
Speaker B:Just talk about it.
Speaker B:All right.
Speaker B:All right, here we go.
Speaker A:Land this airplane.
Speaker B:You want me to do it?
Speaker A:Either way.
Speaker A:Let's see.
Speaker A:You did the call to action.
Speaker B:You want to do it?
Speaker B:I mean, we just talk about it.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:Wanna do it?
Speaker A:I guess you can start it off and I'll.
Speaker B:All right, here we go.
Speaker B:Okay, I'm just gonna start over.
Speaker B:And now we have a bonus tip.
Speaker B:So we already talked about number one, have fun together.
Speaker B:So when you started dating, you did things that were fun, you did things that brought you closer, and you had fun, and it brought you closer as a couple.
Speaker B:Don't stop doing that.
Speaker B:Don't stop having fun.
Speaker B:Two, we cannot overemphasize.
Speaker B:We cannot exaggerate this, but pray together every day is a must for every Christian couple.
Speaker B:Number three, we said, make eye contact when you speak.
Speaker B:Slow things down, look into each other's eyes when you talk.
Speaker B:Stop looking at the phone, stop looking at the tv.
Speaker B:Look at each other.
Speaker B:And this is our bonus tip, is the five minute Eye Connection Challenge.
Speaker B:One of our top marriage tips, if you've ever had, was make time every day to connect.
Speaker A:That is true.
Speaker B:Top marriage builder that we've ever had was make take the time to connect every day.
Speaker B:So you need to do this every day.
Speaker B:You got to connect each other.
Speaker B:You got to talk.
Speaker B:You got to have some kind of connection every day where you, you know, it's more than just Billy has a ball game on Thursday and Sally has her dance lesson on.
Speaker B:On Friday.
Speaker B:You got to get to the deeper stuff.
Speaker B:So you gotta stop staying up as late as you.
Speaker B:As you possibly can.
Speaker B:Don't stay up late.
Speaker B:Just try to go bed early.
Speaker B:Try to go to bed five minutes early.
Speaker B:Right, Teresa?
Speaker B:Don't go to bed when you're so tired.
Speaker B:You can't do this and just spend five minutes, look in each other's eyes.
Speaker B:What does that do, Teresa?
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:I think that would just really develop some intimacy maybe that you haven't experienced before.
Speaker A:Just taking that time and saying, okay, we're settled down, we're ready to go to bed, but let's just look in each other's eyes.
Speaker B:I just think you can talk.
Speaker A:So sweet.
Speaker B:You can talk.
Speaker B:Don't have the TV going, right?
Speaker B:Don't have the phone nearby.
Speaker B:Just.
Speaker B:No, no distractions.
Speaker B:You can.
Speaker B:You can talk, you can pray together, but you need to be looking each other's eyes.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker B:Now, it may feel awkward, it may feel funny, you may feel silly, but it really is about building that emotional intimacy, isn't it, Teresa?
Speaker B:Mm.
Speaker A:It is.
Speaker A:It is.
Speaker A:I just think that's so sweet, you know, holding hands, looking to each other's eyes.
Speaker A:You may want to say some things that you've just been thinking about saying all day, but it's like, well, I don't want to put that in a text.
Speaker A:I really like to tell them in person.
Speaker A:And, well, now you've got some time.
Speaker A:You can just express something like, I really appreciated something you did today and tell them about it.
Speaker B:And I know that everyone's different.
Speaker B:Everyone has different schedules.
Speaker B:I know there's couples that, you know, they might even work different shifts, you know, night versus day.
Speaker B:I know, I know.
Speaker B:There's.
Speaker B:Everyone is a different place in their life, but you got to find five minutes in your day where it's common, where you can do this, whether it's in the morning, whether it's in the afternoon, whether it's at night.
Speaker B:You gotta make the sacrifice to come together and have this connection.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker B:It really, you know, it really helps with touch, it helps with time.
Speaker B:It kind of touches on a lot of love languages, doesn't, Teresa?
Speaker A:It really does.
Speaker B:Love languages are act of service, words of affirmation, touch, time and gifts.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:So it's really something you can give each other.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker B:So I mean, it's just a way to bless your spouse.
Speaker B:You don't need to watch that last episode, you know, it can wait.
Speaker B:It's not that it's not really important how that game is going to end.
Speaker B:It's really not.
Speaker B:So it's just a way to restore and reinforce your friendship as a way to increase your physical connection.
Speaker B:And that's so consistency beats intensity.
Speaker B:Five intentional minutes daily, it can completely change the atmosphere of your marriage.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker A:So if you're a Christian couple longing for closeness, remember, marriage doesn't need dramatic overhauls.
Speaker A:It needs daily rhythms and like Jeff said, being consistent.
Speaker A:When you start something new like this, you'll be able to tell a difference.
Speaker A:Maybe won't even take very long, but over time, you'll see that it is building something in your marriage that you needed that you probably were longing for that, that closeness, that connection every day.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:Remember, have fun together, pray together, make eye contact and protect that five sacred minutes before going to bed.
Speaker B:And I say sacred because that is if it's precious to you.
Speaker B:I guess we'll say protect those five precious minutes before going to bed.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker A:So to have a strong Christian marriage, it's really built on friendship and prayer and communication and intentional connection.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:If you have a prayer request, we would love to pray with you and for you.
Speaker B:You can send us a email@inspiringmarriagest.net and we would be honored to pray.
Speaker B:Pray for you.
Speaker B:And if this episode has encouraged you, you can subscribe to our our podcast, Inspiring Marriages.
Speaker B:You can catch us over on YouTube to search for inspiring marriages on the YouTube, our YouTube channel and you can subscribe to us there.
Speaker B:You can share this episode with other Christian couples.
Speaker B:And please leave us review so more married Christians can find hope and practical building marriage advice.
Speaker B:Hey, what is that one habit that you implemented in your marriage that was life changing?
Speaker B:Let us know.
Speaker B:And until next time, remember that husband and wife are friends for life.
