Everlasting Love or Fairy Tale? Let's Dive In!
Everlasting love can sometimes feel like a fairy tale, right? But what if I told you it’s not all about luck or chance? Nope, it's about putting in some intentional, faith-filled effort! We’re here to help you build that friendship and romance in your marriage with some real, tangible steps and spiritual truths. Think of us as your love coaches, ready to give you the lowdown on how to nurture a love that can totally stand the test of time. So, let’s jump in and get started on this journey to make your love story even more epic! Ever wonder if true love is just a fairy tale? Well, grab your favorite drink and settle in, because we’re diving deep into the secrets behind lasting love. It’s not just about luck or chance; it takes intentional effort and a sprinkle of faith. We’re all about inspiring marriages, and in this chat, we’re giving you some solid steps to nurture a love that can withstand the test of time. Think of it like building a cozy fort in a storm—strong, safe, and totally protective! We share insights on how to communicate intentionally, cultivate joy, and navigate the rough seas of life together, all while keeping your friendship at the forefront. Stick around, because we want to hear your love stories too! Getting into the meat and potatoes (or tofu and veggies, if that’s your jam), we chat about the importance of a rock-solid foundation in marriage. Spoiler alert: that foundation is Jesus! We explore the concept that marriage is a team effort, and in order to weather life’s storms, you’ve got to communicate effectively. It’s not just about talking; it’s about actively listening and truly hearing your partner. We share practical tips on how to keep the lines of communication open, including the power of “I feel” statements to avoid the dreaded blame game. It’s all about creating a safe space where both partners can express themselves without fear of judgment. So, if you’ve ever argued over who left the dishes in the sink, you might want to listen up! As we wrap up our conversation, we dig into the nitty-gritty of what it means to cultivate friendship and romance in marriage. It’s not just about date nights (although those are fun too)—it’s about creating shared experiences and hobbies that bring you closer. We emphasize the importance of serving together, whether it’s at church or in your community, because nothing builds a bond like working side by side for a common goal. Plus, let’s not forget the importance of physical intimacy and keeping that spark alive. With all of this wisdom packed into our chat, we’re here to remind you that with God at the center, lasting love isn’t just a possibility; it’s a beautiful reality. So, what’s your secret to a happy marriage? Let’s share tips and keep the conversation going!
Takeaways:
- Everlasting love might seem like a fairy tale, but it's all about intentional effort, not just luck!
- Building a strong marriage means laying down a solid foundation, and that foundation is Jesus, folks.
- Communication is key! Speak life into your spouse and truly listen to what they say, always!
- Don’t forget to have fun together! Shared hobbies and laughter can really strengthen your bond.
- Remember that forgiveness is a daily choice, and you gotta weather the storms of life together.
- Cultivating friendship and romance is vital; so don’t skip those date nights, they really matter!
Transcript
Does everlasting love just sometimes feel like it's a fairy tale?
Speaker B:What if we told you that the secret isn't just luck or chance, but it requires intentional, faith filled effort.
Speaker A:Our mission here at Inspiring Marriages is to inspire and help couples build their friendship and thus build their marriage and romance.
Speaker B:In this video we we're going to give you tangible steps and spiritual truths to nurture a love that will stand the test of time.
Speaker A:Hey, we would love to hear how long you have been together, so drop a comment below and let us know.
Speaker A:Let's dive in.
Speaker A:Teresa.
Speaker A:It is so important to build our marriages on the rock.
Speaker A:And that rock is Jesus.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker A:So anybody knows who's making a building?
Speaker A:You got to have a firm foundation.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker A:Jesus tells us in Matthew chapter 7, verse 24 and 25.
Speaker A:He says, Anyone who listens to my teachings and follows it is wise.
Speaker A:Like a person who builds a house on a solid rock.
Speaker A:Though the rain comes in torrents and the flood waters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won't collapse because it's built upon bedrock.
Speaker B:That's so good.
Speaker B:Amen.
Speaker B:So there are practical things that we can do to build on this rock.
Speaker B:You can pray together, study the Bible together, and of course attend church together.
Speaker A:Key number one of building your marriage on the rock on a firm foundation is to have intentional communication.
Speaker A:You have to speak life into your spouse.
Speaker A:Isn't that right, Theresa?
Speaker B:That's so good.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:Being intentional in your communication.
Speaker B:So that means you need to be open and honest with your spouse.
Speaker B:That's so important.
Speaker B:And being intentional means you're going to talk, plan ahead what you want to say.
Speaker B:You know, don't just throw things at your spouse and you know, for a shock effect.
Speaker B:You want to be gentle and kind with your words.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:Husbands, your wife needs open, honest and loving communication.
Speaker A:She has to have that.
Speaker A:It builds her up.
Speaker A:It encourages her.
Speaker A:You speak life to her when you do that.
Speaker A:Here's some practical tips.
Speaker A:Practice active listening.
Speaker A:Now when you're talking to your spouse and even if you're having an argument, the goal is not to to beat your spouse in a debate.
Speaker A:Because if your spouse loses, you lose.
Speaker A:The goal is to come together in all areas of your life, in all areas of intimacy.
Speaker A:Spiritual.
Speaker A:It's emotional, it's intellectual, and it's physically.
Speaker A:Right, Theresa?
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:So in one way to do this is through active listening.
Speaker B:You've got to emphasize really hearing your spouse.
Speaker B:Don't just be waiting for them to finish talking.
Speaker B:Because I know what I want to say.
Speaker B:You know, we're not trying, like Jeff said, we're not trying to have a debate and win an argument.
Speaker B:You really need to look at your spouse and give them your full attention and listen to what they're saying.
Speaker B:Listen to the heart, what their heart is expressing and what they're saying.
Speaker A:Right, Right.
Speaker A:So your goal is never to win an argument.
Speaker A:It's never to go.
Speaker A:The goal is to come together.
Speaker A:You use the I feel statements when, when you say this, I feel this.
Speaker A:When you do this, I feel this.
Speaker A:So you got to be able to express to your spouse what you're going through, what's, what you're feeling, what you're, what you're expressing.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:And that, that will keep you from just blaming your spouse.
Speaker B:You always do this and you never do that.
Speaker B:And whenever I come home, this happens.
Speaker B:You know, it's, it's going to avoid a lot of that naming and blaming kind of stuff.
Speaker A:Avoid always and never use I feel.
Speaker A:And you got to have scheduled check ins.
Speaker A:You got to have a time, try to have it every day.
Speaker A:I know it's tough.
Speaker A:I know life gets hard and life gets busy, but try to have a check in every day where you really talk, talk, talk.
Speaker A:Like beyond the surface area talking.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker A:Beyond the schedules and beyond what's going on, beyond the fluff.
Speaker A:Get down to the nitty gritty.
Speaker A:What's going on in each other's hearts that's so important.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:And if whatever time works better for you, you know, it may not be right when you both get home from work or your spouse gets home from work because that can be a hectic time.
Speaker B:So choose a time that works well, where you can be quiet and turn off distractions and just spend time together and listen to each other and reconnect for the day.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And we want to, I hate to use the term fight, but fight fair and forgive quickly.
Speaker A:Jesus told us In Matthew chapter 18, verse 15, if a believer sins against you, against you, go to them privately.
Speaker A:So when you talk, when you're talking to your spouse, if you're, if you have a conflict, don't expose it.
Speaker A:Don't expose your spouse to relatives and social media and wherever.
Speaker A:Go to them privately and use the active listening I feel and your scheduled check ins to resolve your conflicts.
Speaker A:Key number two of building your marriage on a firm foundation is cultivating friendship and romance is called the joyful journey.
Speaker A:Marriage is about commitment, but it's also enjoying your best friend.
Speaker B:Yes, it is.
Speaker A:Your husband has a.
Speaker A:Has a need for you to be his friend.
Speaker A:He gets more enjoyment of doing things with you than he does in any other person in the world.
Speaker A:He really does.
Speaker B:That's great.
Speaker B:I just love that.
Speaker B:And a lot of women may not realize that having fun together and doing fun things with your husband really is a blessing to him.
Speaker B:That's important to him to be a friend.
Speaker B:So it's great to have date nights, you know, for the romance side of things.
Speaker B:And you can have fun dates, but get together and think about a lot of ideas that you would like to do for dates.
Speaker B:It can be, you know, a wide variety from the simplest things, just playing a board game together or going for walks, or it could be something fancy and, you know, more expensive.
Speaker B:But everything doesn't have to be, you know, high price and.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:A lot of expense to it.
Speaker B:So it.
Speaker B:Yeah, it's supposed to be fun.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:You can have a picnic in your living room with no devices.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Develop shared hobbies and interests.
Speaker A:You got to reconnect your mutual enjoyment.
Speaker A:Develop hobbies together.
Speaker A:Develop interest together.
Speaker A:Don't, you know, come home and one sits on one's couch, the other one says the other couch.
Speaker A:Doing your own thing.
Speaker A:You got to develop interests and hobbies to you both.
Speaker A:Enjoy.
Speaker A:Serve together somewhere.
Speaker A:Whether it be at church or a community outreach somewhere, cleaning up the neighborhood.
Speaker A:Serve somewhere together.
Speaker B:Yes, that's.
Speaker B:That's so important.
Speaker B:You feel so bonded doing that and serving people.
Speaker B:You both get to enj that gratifying sense of, you know, we did something for other people, we reached out to other people and helped.
Speaker B:And it can be just something going on in your church that they need people to volunteer.
Speaker B:Or it could be a certain area of your church ministry where you can just continue to lend a hand and be regular there to serve and volunteer.
Speaker B:And it's, it's very rewarding.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And you can't neglect physical intimacy with wives.
Speaker A:One of your husband's major needs is physical intimacy.
Speaker A:He feels more close to you when you've been physically intimate.
Speaker A:He's more apt to open up to you emotionally when you're, when you're physically intimate.
Speaker A:Just husbands like your wife, she needs to feel emotionally connected to you to open up to you physically.
Speaker A:And it just goes together.
Speaker B:It really does.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker A:But if you would like a free PDF of fun ways to build your friendship, just drop the comment Friendship Builder in the comments below and we'll send you a link to receive Our free PDF on creative date ideas to build your friendship.
Speaker A:Key number three of building your marriage on the rock is practice forgiveness and resilience.
Speaker A:You gotta weather the storms together.
Speaker A:You are a team.
Speaker A:God has called you to be one for this cause shall man leave his father, mother, and be cleaved to join, to be glued to his wife, and they shall become one flesh?
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:So you're together.
Speaker A:You're the best prayer partner you could ever have in the entire world is right there in the bed with you.
Speaker A:So don't neglect whether in the storms together.
Speaker B:That's so true.
Speaker A:No marriage is perfect.
Speaker A:Lasting love requires grace, forgiveness and perseverance.
Speaker A:Right, Tracy?
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:That's so true.
Speaker B:You can't really work as a team and go through a storm together if there's a wedge between you or there was unforgiveness operating there, if there's resentment, hurts, you've got to work on resolving those things because when a trial comes, can't be falling apart in your marriage.
Speaker B:You need to both be able to join together and work through it together, pray together and get encouragement together from the Lord and from, you know, people that you look to for help.
Speaker B:You have to be together when a storm comes for sure.
Speaker A:You got to get rid of the mentality.
Speaker A:I'm just going to deal with it myself that has.
Speaker A:That goes out the door as soon as you say, I do.
Speaker A:You got to fight it together so good.
Speaker A:You got to choose forgiveness daily.
Speaker A:And you know, it's.
Speaker A:You may not feel like forgiving, but forgiveness is a choice.
Speaker A:Joyce Meyer said, when you say, I'll forgive, but I won't forget, you're choosing not to forgive.
Speaker B:Exactly.
Speaker A:You really are.
Speaker A:And you sometimes you just got to forgive before your feelings are there.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:So we can learn from the challenges we've already been through.
Speaker B:You can look back at the course of your marriage or maybe just the past year and say, wow, we were able to overcome a challenge together in our marriage or a challenge with our children.
Speaker B:And now if a struggle comes up, if something comes up, that's a new challenge, a new thing to go through, well, okay, we've got that history.
Speaker B:Now that we know we can get through things together, we know God will give us answers and show us what to do.
Speaker B:So you've got a history now to say, we're going to get through this.
Speaker A:We'Re going to get through you.
Speaker A:Will you stay together and you hang on to God.
Speaker A:You will get through it.
Speaker A:And don't put off getting help or support.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker A:Don't be feel ashamed if you need to talk to somebody.
Speaker A:Not that everyone needs to hear all your your business.
Speaker B:Oh no.
Speaker A:But seek wise counsel.
Speaker A:Maybe from your church leaders or a mentor, some Christian mentors you may have and maybe an older couple in your church who is walking, has walked through it.
Speaker A:Invite them to lunch, invite them to dinner and just, just ask them about their experiences.
Speaker A:They can tell you how they got through it.
Speaker A:Not that it becomes a dumping session.
Speaker A:It's not for that.
Speaker A:It's just to learn from someone else.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker B:You can get wisdom from hearing other people's stories about how they overcame a challenge, how they got through things by leaning on the Lord and staying together in their marriage.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:You have a 100% chance of having a successful marriage and you have a legacy of lasting love.
Speaker A:So remember, so what we talked about today is intentional communication.
Speaker A:You got to cultivate your friendship and you got to practice forgiveness daily.
Speaker A:Lasting love is not only possible, it's probable with God.
Speaker A:And it's worth the effort.
Speaker B:Yes, it is.
Speaker B:Absolutely.
Speaker A:Now what is your secret to lasting love?
Speaker A:Share your best tip in the comments below.
Speaker A:We would love to hear them.
Speaker A:And if you're ready to build an inspiring marriages, hit that subscribe button.
Speaker A:And if you want to watch some other videos on how to build spiritual intimacy, watch this playlist here.
Speaker A:Until next time, remember, husband and wife.
Speaker B:Are friends for life.
